rice cake confessional

This post has nothing to do with food. Good thing I am supreme ruler of this blog and can talk about whatever the heck I please. Today, we’re talking about signs. One particular sign actually. Sadly, this will not be about the hit song “The Sign” popularized by the very talented Ace of Base.

Singapore, as you might be aware, is a land of  many rules. I love rules therefore I love Singapore.

I posted this particular picture in my Facebook account and my brother and his friend decided to put in their own interpretations for the various pictures. It’s one of those things that I go back to for a good laugh every now and then. Now, dear readers, I share it with you. You too can have some laughs. You deserve it.

Chris says the signs mean:

1. Googly-eyed fish are not to be teased with baby hooks.
2. The capture of mutant butterflies and other insects will not be tolerated.
3. No parallelograms with angles < 90 degrees allowed…also no triangles.
4. No stabbing happy monkey heads with miniature corn on the cob.
5. No squeezing birds and teasing them by holding cherries just out of their reach.
6. No sanitizers allowed when giving handshakes with your left hand.
7. Black bars are not to be snapped.
8. Matches that emit an abnormally large flame are not allowed.
9. No jumping over cars perpendicular to a bicycle with dirt bikes.
10. No neck-less dogs.
11. No pulling weeds, despite the great aesthetic improvement to greenery it does.
12. Absolutely no targeting of antique musical equipment.

Chris’s friend, Jeff’s is sure that they actually say:

1. If you’re a fish, don’t look at the floaty thing in the water.
2. Do not catch butterflies and ladybugs at the same time.
3. Circles only.
4. Do not open only half the banana.
5. Same as yours.
6. Do not get papercuts.
7. Same as yours.
8. No black flames.
9. No dirtbiking over a car onto a bicycle tricks.
10. Do not behead dogs.
11. Do not break 3-leafed plants, 4-leafed clovers only.
12. Same as yours.

Aren’t you glad they cleared that up for you?

As a bonus here’s one of my favorite signs in Singapore. Don’t feed the animals = do not let these creatures become codependent couch potatoes.

C’mon laugh. If you’re in the US you’re reading this on a Wednesday. This will help you get over hump day and right up into the ever waiting weekend.